Saturday, May 12, 2012

Mama Gets A Helping Hand

From the minute I became pregnant at twenty-two years old, I knew, I was meant to be somebody's Mama. Every day, every minute, and all the seconds that I carried each child in my womb, I knew that we would be forever joined in mind, body and soul. 

What I did not know, is that at the age of thirty-three years old, for all intent and purposes, I would become Mama and Daddy to both of my children. I would make all the major decisions, sit all alone in many emergency rooms on weekends when doctors are not in their offices, tend to all the homework assignments, and hug away most of the tears. I had no idea just how much my life was about to change. 

It would be me who packed every book bag and every lunch box.  Worried about the jacket I let them leave at home that morning, because it was warm at 7am but by 2pm when school was letting out, a cold front had come through and the temperature had dropped fifteen degrees, causing me to fret about how cold would they be walking from the bus stop to the house. Or the toy I forgot was supposed to be taken for show and tell. And how I would worry they would be the only one without something to show. And worst of all, all the school programs where my boys would be the only one with one parent in attendance. 

Somewhere along the way, I was no longer alone. I met a man, who even though he was not the father of my children, nor my husband for many years to come, never missed a tee-ball game, a band performance, school function, tiny mites football, birthday party, or graduation.

Finally I had someone who would truly share his love and attention with my boys.  He gave advice, built fences, taught them to cut grass, create man sheds, listened to their stories, how their days went, and love them unconditionally no matter what. My boys were calling him their Daddy long before I ever even knew it. 

The point of this story today is to say this....I think I'm a better Mama today because of the man who would become their Bonus Daddy. I was taught patience I did not have, reasoning I never considered, and that it was alright to share. It was alright to let someone else take the lead, to walk ahead of me and me behind for a change, and that the world would not stop if I didn't have the last say, or the loudest opinion. 

I appreciate that my job was made easier. I am grateful that someone loved my two boys with so much love, that no one knows the difference between what's blood or water. And I am forever proud that I now have an extra ear to listen, shoulder to cry on, and humor when I tend to take myself or situations too seriously. 

Thank you Mims...for asking me to marry you. And for helping me to be a better Mama for my boys.  I take my job as a Mother very seriously and because of you, I have learned to take it lightly and more loosely when I need to as well.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mother's I know. It's a hard job, it's a full time job, and the pay is for crap....don't ever let anybody tell you any different. But the benefits we all reap far outweigh the problems or the heartaches. And everybody knows, there ain't no one in this world who will ever love you like your Mama loves you. And that's a fact.

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