He Led And I Followed

Who knows why you have to get older to realize some things. Who knows why you can't recognize the genius of it when it's happening. And who knows no matter how much we say we won't end up just like them, somehow, we seem to anyway.

My Daddy taught me so many things. So many useful and positive things. But you don't only learn from the positive. If you're honest with yourself, you also learn from the negative.

I was lying in bed, trying to sleep, but my mind just kept whirling around and around and around. Nothing to do but get back up, and get it out. Put it all down. So my mind could rest.

This is for you Daddy, and I hope it makes you proud, those are my intentions. For I am a mixture of you. The good, the bad and the parts that still need some work.

1.  You taught me that self entitlement does not exist. Employ thyself does. 
2.  You taught me that simply saying you're sorry is sometimes just not enough.
3.  You taught me temper and how to use it. You also taught me that one rarely fairs well when it happens.
4.  You taught me that a heavy hand creates a heavy heart. Always.
5.  You taught me love and compassion. And empathy to a fault.
6.  You taught me how to worry which led to learning how to pray.
7.  You taught me to be truthful and to understand I cannot pick and choose when.
8.  You taught me I could do anything. And that if I couldn't, be wise enough to ask someone to help me.
9.  You taught me intelligence + financial security = Independence.
10.You taught me family always comes first, second and third.
11. You taught me that you too, were human, and that you would make mistakes.
12. You taught me reason with chaos.
13. You taught me openness with a closed mouth.
14. You taught me to fight for what I believe in, even if I am the only one who does.
15. You taught me to never put on paper, what I was not willing to sign with a signature.
16. You taught me there are two sides to every story and that just because it was my side, did not make it the right one.
17.You taught me that there is no such thing as "what is fair" in this world. If you work hard, and do right, good things will come and that's about all that "what is fair" is really about.
18.You taught me there are no silver spoons in our family. That I will always have to work for what I receive and that I will most likely be better off for it. That being rich, never seems to make all that many people happy anyway.
19. You taught me that just because I love someone with all of my heart, does not mean they will always love me the same.
20. And, you taught me that I am never too old to learn something new, almost every single day of my life.

Growing up with you for a Daddy was pretty tough some days. I will never say that it wasn't. But you also taught me something else that was one of the most important things I learned from you. You taught me to recognize when no matter what has happened or will happen, that someone's heart is in the right place. That their intentions were honorable and good, and that they only want the best for you. I won't say I knew all of that growing up. But I've known it for a pretty good while now. And I wouldn't trade you for any other man in the world.

I love you Daddy. Happy Father's Day.