The Holiday Trap

Well folks, we’re on the backside of Christmas and New Year’s and hurdling straight into the month of Cupid, hearts, candy and flowers. Any store you might enter appears to be totally confused as to what should be on display and it’s kind of confusing to the consumer as well.

You arrive at whatever store, your frame of mind set on what you traveled there for and you walk into the front door and on the right-hand side of the entrance is a pile of combined Christmas and Fall decorations, all marked down to the low, low price of next to nothing. Then on the other side of the aisle is SURPRISE! NOT -Valentine cards, decorations, napkins and coffee cups blaring out those little sayings like “you fill me up with love and warmth” – you know that cute little double entendre that makes you wanna gag unless you’re young and in that icky kind of love stage; which for the record, I have not been since 1979.

So, you are visiting this store looking for artificial flowers for a potential flower arrangement, but as soon as you walk in the door, that whole mind thought has disappeared and your brain is doubling down trying to mentally calculate the percentages off certain merchandise as you are steadily packing it into your cart thinking “man, what a deal!” You know when you get home, you’ll have plenty to explain, so you’re already conjuring up your very rational reasoning for buying a cart load of stuff you won’t even look at, much less use until next year! But that’s okay, because you’re a pro-defender of buying things on sale. Who could NOT buy that adorable little pumpkin napkin-holder for $2.50 when it had been $12.50 – right?! Who in their right mind could walk away from that kind of deal? Especially when NEXT year it is going to be just ADORABLE as the centerpiece on your Thanksgiving dinner table! That’s what I’m talking about – sell it sister! Sell that idea like you practically stole it from the store!

But then, your eyes wander to the other side of the entrance way – where all those hearts and mush are just staring at you, daring you to take the leap, walk over, and check it all out.  The little heart door-hangers, decorative wall-hangings, all the things that make your heart pitter patter for days gone by. And even if you’re past that particular stage in your life, most of us still have children and grandchildren who come to mind when we see all those things. I bought my children Valentine boxers and candy until they were well into their 20’s!

Somehow, that day, I made it past the holiday traps. I actually walked straight past it all, and headed towards the seven rows of artificial flowers that I would now bury myself into trying to find the perfect color combinations. After looking at different shapes and shades of flowers until my eyes were blurred, I found what I needed and walked right out of there with no “extra’s” in my bags! Well, except for a few funny birthday cards I snagged on my way out. But that’s another addiction topic for another day.

ROLL TEARS ROLL

I was home alone, so whatever was about to happen and take its place in history – it would happen without an audience.  It wouldn’t officially start until 8pm, it was already dark outside, I was already half-sleepy, and I was already wondering if I would make it until the end to see the results.

I had been amped-up about this for days! I mean who wouldn’t be? Well, I guess fans of other teams could have cared less, but I am a true-blue Alabama fan, so the fact they had made it all the way to the National Championship – well, I could barely contain myself.

So, there they were, Alabama and Clemson, set to take the field. All the niceties were over, interviews said and done, and Clemson’s band was on the field for one last show before kick-off.

Both teams individually burst onto the field, pumped and exhilarated with what must have been the ultimate high. The game was being held in California, where obviously, neither team was from – but given the colors of orange and red spread throughout the stands on all sides – you would never know these southern teams were in a foreign state.

I had actually read earlier that day on the internet that tickets were hard to sell, and they were worried about the stadium being filled to capacity. Well, if there was a seat left, I surely couldn’t tell, and they were of course, all mixed together as that’s how random seats are sold. No one side is sectioned off for either team. So, you could fully expect to see an Elephant head sitting next to a Tiger face and looking like they couldn’t be happier about it!

I’m going to be truthful and tell you that I knew from the initial kick-off, things were not going to go well. Alabama was intercepted on the first drive and it was all down hill after that. Yeah, we scored a few touch downs but we couldn’t get a ball between the uprights to save our soul. Clemson came prepared and ready, and they came at Alabama with all their heart and soul, ALL NIGHT LONG.

But I’ll tell you what impressed me the most about that Clemson team – they loved and believed in God and were not afraid/ashamed to say it. Before the game, after the game, so many of them interviewed, gave all the glory to Him.

Football Is What You Do.  It Is Not Who You Are. – Trevor Lawrence said, “It’s kind of always been my personality. Football is important to me, obviously, but it’s not my life.”   

Situations Do Not Have to Define Leaders – he added, “I would say knowing who I am outside of that, so I just know no matter how big the situation is, it won’t define me.”

A Leader’s Identity Should Be in Jesus Christ And Who He Says You Are – Trevor concluded by saying, “I put my identity in what Christ says, who He thinks I am and who I know that He says I am.”

That’s the winning Clemson Quarterback right there folks. That’s a young man, who’s winning in life.

Congratulations on a well-deserved win Clemson!

Days of Dining

There is a restaurant that my husband and I frequent once every couple of months; the name of it is The Wilderness Cabin and it’s located on the east side of Tallahassee. It’s a totally buffet-style place to dine, with a large open area, decorated to match the name, and clean. Always very clean, and the lady that runs/owns it must be at least in her early 80’s, but man alive, does she run a tight ship.

They have waiters and waitresses, but with it being a buffet, their only jobs are to tend to your tea/water glasses, make sure you’re still doing alright (usually asking when your mouth is full of food) and then they leave the ticket behind – assuring you there is no rush, just pay and leave at your leisure/convenience. And of course, keeping the tables clean as diners come and go.

All of the wait staff dresses in black and white clothing, and all know their duties, as the owner’s eyes rove often and see everything, and no area better sit too long with empty chairs and dirty table-tops. She runs the kitchen staff in the same brusque manner – as no warming-tin had better be scraped empty before another is replacing it – even if she has to do it herself, which she has.

The restaurant has been open about three years now I guess, and what I have noticed the most is the crowd it attracts. There are on occasion younger folks who come in to dine, but as a general rule, I’d say the crowd age range is between 60 and 90 years of age for the most part. And I do mean 90, equipped with walkers, wheel chairs etc. And they are all dressed to the nines as they say, complete in their best Sunday dress, fancy church hats and all.

And while they do draw a huge Sunday lunch-time/after church crowd, you will see them dressed that way pretty much whatever day you grace the inside of those doors. It’s a generation that still believes in dressing-up to go out and dine, and it’s hard to believe that Levi’s and flannel shirts have ever been a part of their attire.

Because of the cost, you’re not likely to see gangs of families with handfuls of children – and honestly, that’s alright by me. Frankly, it’s nice to go somewhere, sit down and eat, without loud groups of people or antsy children who can’t/won’t be made to sit still in their seats. And because no alcohol is ever served – this is strictly a sweet tea joint - you never have to worry about unruly scenes of any kind.

But mostly what I notice, is myself and my husband, being noticed. People looking at us as if to be thinking, “oh my, what I wouldn’t give to be that young again”. Because I’m noticing them as well, in their fine clothes, carefully combed/fixed hair, and wondering if I too, will have still have that grace and care about myself when I reach their age; it’s definitely some to aspire to.  I pray I do.

Vacation Well Spent!

I was off the entire week of Christmas, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. There was a lot going on in that time; cook, eat, clean, repeat. We ate all the original meals of course, the turkey & dressing and all the makings for Christmas, and the hog jowls, blackeye peas, and turnip greens for our New Year’s Day meal. We ate our jaws off folks. It felt like every time I turned around we were eating again.

And in the middle of both occasions, of course we were sick of holiday food, so we ate a bunch of other stuff. At some point I can remember saying I needed to eat some “real food” – so nothing would do but to grill a steak and bake a potato. I also made a huge pot of vegetable soup and some cornbread to go with it. Between holiday food and real food – we didn’t miss a lick at eating I can assure you of that!

We also somehow managed during all that table-grazing, to take down all the Christmas decorations and put our house back in order. As I’ve said before, I’m always excited to decorate for Christmas, but I’m also always ready for it all to come back down, four something weeks later.

But the thing we seemed to do the most was watch every single thing on television that we could possibly find to watch. All the college football bowl games, about 15 episodes each of Andy Griffith, Gunsmoke, and MASH. We also watched the Kennedy Center Honors – which among the honorees was Cher and Reba – both stars known nationwide by their first name.

But as is usual, we use time off like that to watch movies we’ve been wanting to see but never seem to have time. We watched several and while I won’t give complete reviews (mostly because no one probably cares) because I don’t want to dissuade anyone from watching the best movie they may have ever seen – I am going to tell you Dumplin was absolutely wonderful and Bird Box was horrendous.

Dumplin was full of Dolly Parton songs, Dolly Parton fan-girl’ing, and Dolly Parton’s ideas about love and life and how all that should work. It was heart-touching and necessary and it made me cry. I never really cry anymore.  “Find out who you are and do it on purpose. —Dolly Parton” If you hate feeling better about yourself – this is not the movie for you.

Bird Box is everything that I never watch – apocalypse-like activity, very graphic violence mixed with entirely too much spooky stuff. Voices in the background that didn’t belong to people or bodies and creatures in the woods threatening to snatch you and make you become one of them. I didn’t do my normal movie review prior to, so I take complete responsibility for scaring myself to death. Which also resulted in my having to watch 20 episodes of Friends until 2am in the morning to get past “the voices”. If you like terrifying, end-of-the-world movies, then this one is for you.

I know, I said I wouldn’t give my review. But some movies should come with warning labels; and I just gave them to you. 

 

2019, Here We Come!

We’re about to roll into the New Year. A year that will hold surprises, happiness and sadness. A year that will bring new babies, new beginnings, endings, and new husbands and wives. A year that brings graduations, promotions and losses. A year that will bring new love, loss of love, heartache and lessons learned.

When we pass from one year to another, especially a year that has seemed more trying, we all wish for a better one ahead. We always hope to walk away from the year that seemed to test our strength and willpower, towards another year that will be kinder to our hearts and our bodies. That we leave the year of sickness and sorrow behind, for another year filled with good health.

The year 2018 is just about over folks, and while I can’t say it was an especially bad year for me; I have had better, but that was a long, long time ago. Honestly, I think the older I get, the lower the bar is set for what I believe to be acceptable and not. I mean, if I can make it through a year with no major sicknesses, no broken bones or sprained ankles from stumbling into holes in my yard or over the curb I didn’t see, my family stays relatively healthy, my children are progressing and moving forward in life, and we all still have jobs and our homes – I consider that to be a pretty banner year.

I no longer take my health for granted like I did from birth until I was about 30 or so. I know there are all kinds of things around the corner, just waiting to jump on me if I get lax in my resolve to take better care of myself.

As a lot of you may remember, I’ve been on a “diet” for several months now – since about the first part of October. My goal was to reach a weight loss of 25 pounds by December 31^st – and while I don’t know yet that I’ll make it, I am down 20 pounds and that’s more than I’ve succeeded in quite some time. I’m still sticking to the nothing but water and my one cup of coffee each day. I confess I did have two glasses of sweet tea with my Thanksgiving meal, but the next morning when I opened the refrigerator and saw the rest of that tea in the pitcher staring me down, calling my name, I poured it all down the sink and back to the water I went.

So I have no real resolutions for the New Year. Some of you may remember me telling you last year about this time to not vow to lose 50 pounds, just try and lose 15, and keep it off. So I’ve dropped 20 and that’s my vow, to keep it off and to keep going. Keep the resolutions simple and doable, your goals reality-based and your disappointments will be less.

The New Year is headed our way and we only have just so much control over what comes with it. Take charge of what you can, and pray for the rest.

Have a safe and Happy New Year!

Christmas as a Grown-up

Norman Rockwell holidays don’t exist. At least not in my world they don’t. Oh, you can pretty it all up, string some lights on it, and tag with a big red bow – but if real people, real human beings are involved, then stuff is going to happen.

Many of us have been married so long, we finish each other’s sentences and superbly ignore the irritating things about the other. Those things that in quiet times of reflection can send you over the edge.

He clicks his fingernails against one another, but only when you’re trying to watch television. Click, click, click. She glances over at him and stares just long enough that she hopes he “gets it” and stops. He does for a couple of minutes, and then either forgets or doesn’t care how much it bothers her, and he starts again.

She wants to do her pedicure’s right in the middle of the living room, while he’s trying to watch the last NASCAR race of the year. And she’s commentating, all through it, even though he knows that she knows NOTHING about what she’s saying. He would drown her out, but she just gets louder if he doesn’t answer.

They’ve been together for years now, the “duties” have long ago been split and everyone knows their part. So, she wonders why she still has to verbally ask him will he take out the trash, because surely, he can see for himself that things are now toppling over. He acts as if he doesn’t mind, but she thinks – if he doesn’t mind – then WHY WON’T HE JUST DO IT?!

He comes in from work, he’s starving, but he doesn’t smell anything cooking. He tries to remember when all of that stopped. When it just stopped being normal to have a cooked meal every night after a hard day’s work. Ah, now he remembers, he knows exactly when everything changed. When the last kid left home.

When the children are all gone and there is a space between them leaving and grandchildren arriving – you don’t quite know what to do with yourself. Or your empty house. All the things that drive you crazy now – you didn’t have much time to notice it before. Something else was always happening – you always seemed to have some other place to be.

And how much you love Christmas and the other holidays changes as well. Your children are splitting their time between multiple families, all the gatherings are not under your roof, and everybody isn’t going to come home every holiday.

It’s hard. It’s really hard. You talk to yourself and tell yourself, new days are coming, new times, with new traditions – but a part of you is selfish and you want everything to stay the same, be the same, as it always was.

Well that’s not how life really works. So, we look for new ways to find our happy and our joy. New ways to feel the same Christmas spirit as everyone else. It might not always work every single day, but when it does, man is it glorious!

Here’s to wishing you all a Merry Christmas filled with peace, love, hope and many days of absolute gloriousness. 

ROLL TIDE ROLL!!!!

I will preface everything I am about to say with this: every single solitary person in my family who is a generation right above me and beyond – is from the great state of Alabama. Most of them were also born and raised in Alabama, some have since moved on and branched out into other states.

But let me also say this to make sure there is no confusion where their loyalties continue to lie: it does not matter where they go, or how far away – they are ALL still University of Alabama football fans. With the exception of one or two black sheep that wandered off into Auburn territory – but we don’t talk about that; its in bad taste.

I, myself, am from Georgia – technically though, as both my parents will tell you – I was born right across the Georgia/Alabama line at St. Frances Hospital in Columbus Georgia; however we lived in Phenix City, Alabama which is where they would have brought me home to; so minor is that technicality, no one even pays it any mind.

Alas, I did grow up in Georgia, so my loyalty is divided. Actually, to get down to the brass tacks of it all, my loyalties are divided three ways. I was “from” Alabama, grew-up in Georgia, and moved to Florida in 1998.

I’m a huge football fan, so when I moved to Florida, I felt like I needed to pick a Florida team to root for; I settled on the Florida Gators. So when the season for college football rolls around each year, I am all over the place as a fan.

BUT – not the night the University of Alabama played the University of Georgia. The Tide ~vs~ The Dawgs. Folks – I was dead in the middle of the Tide that was rolling that night, even if it seemed to take us until the 4^th quarter to start rolling in the right direction.

My house was SO loud that 4^th quarter, I was expecting the neighborhood to petition to evict us. There is no way I could have watched that game in any public forum. I was too loud, my mouth was WAY to salty in language and I would’ve had to go alone, as my husband didn’t even want to be associated with me in our own living room!

He has probably only seen me get like that a few times in our married life. I mean, let’s face it, there are not a lot of do or die games that come along like that – not for teams I really have an attachment to anyway. You would have thought I had our house bargained-up as part of a bet, and we had to win to keep it, the way I was carrying on.

I literally stood-up the entire 4^th quarter, in the middle of the floor, between my recliner and the television, screaming and hollering, fist pumping and stomping, carrying them across the line for the last two touchdowns they needed to move out ahead.

Sunday, I woke-up with a hoarse throat, but still able to holler ROLL TIDE, for every ESPN replay I would see throughout that day. Tide Nation – we are a loyal bunch.